Thursday, January 12, 2012

Still Livin' the Dream

My neglected blog is a product of three things:

1. mothering five children (this reason makes me appear saintly)
2. a preoccupation with wanting to write exclusively about things that make me mad (this reason makes me appear grumpy and full of ingratitude)
3. just trying to keep it all together (I'm easily prone to guilt and worrying about expectations is my specialty)

During my hiatus, I realize that writing about angry issues is cathartic, but publishing them would be silly for so many reasons. My children do and say really funny things and as much as I knew I'd miss the newborn/innocent toddler age, this stage of my family is really the best and I wish I could freeze us all these ages forever. And "Lowering the bar and being awesome," my unofficial official motto, has turned out to be more true than ever.

And I like writing things in lists of three.

I am, in fact, still "almost famous" and the title of this blog still makes me laugh (cry) on the inside. My little brother James and his cute little band continue to dominate the awards ceremonies and are sure to win an award on days when I've had a particularly pointed disappointment that day (losing a job, having a dream project cancelled, having a sick kid, etc--see above #2) But he's still cute and grounded (as much as a rockstar can be, let's be honest), and the other famous people in my life (bloggers, actors, whatnot) are all just doing the best they can under the circumstances. I would say, "Aren't we all? Aren't we all just doing the best we can?" But we all know the answer is, "No, not everyone is." (too grumpy? I'm trying to do better. It's cold and January. . . baby steps.)

And 6 months ago I joined a gym, thereby finding a socially appropriate way to deal with my anxiety/anger/general malaise with society and the number of jobs my husband currently has.

So, that's what's new. What's new with you?

11 comments:

  1. I'm doing the best I can but I do sometimes suspect other people aren't.

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  2. I'm still re-living those girl's camp days...good times, good times. I remember you writing...words are hard. They are. Its difficult to figure out something to really SAY...laundry, dishes, homework. ugh. You're famous for me :).

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  3. Um, Kacy, I really AM trying, but NYC is HARD, ok?

    Lisa, your worst is still better than my best, so always remember that. ;) Love you.

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  4. I'm wondering if we can work out some kind of arrangement where we write the angry blog entries we really want to write, but only send them to each other?

    I'm also wondering if you can help me make a medal for the home-birthing woman in my ward who said it must be hard for me to feel like a "real mother" because I had a c-section.

    Also, I love you.

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  5. Oh Lisa, I hear you. It doesn't really matter where the bar is, you'll still be awesome. I actually like people to publish their angry as well as happy posts. It helps me feel a bit less crazy.
    And Em, as a home birthing Mum myself, I hereby give you permission to smack that lady in your ward.

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  6. I'm filled, nearly to-the-brim, with anxiety most days. That's relatively new.

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  7. I'm glad your back, I've missed you! I'll be in Provo from 24th Feb until 10th March, lets catch up and share what's new! X

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  8. I HAD A BABY. STOP ASKING ME ANYTHING.

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  9. My bar was lowered so much it actually came back around.

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  10. Azucar and La Yen, I have it on good authority (facebook, mostly) that you've just given birth. So, remember: THERE IS NO BAR FOR YOU. If you "need" one, this is it: You keep yourself and the baby alive and happy at times (not all the time or everytime--just some of the time).

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